His hands - our hearts

Every Saturday mid-morning, we are out there in the parking lot of Suggs and Kelly Law Firm under our canopies, tables set for the midday service of a hot meal, dessert and a bag of snacks to go. We serve cold drinks in summer and hot coffee in winter, and for every change of season, there is a chance for the homeless to change out their wardrobe. Not only does CJ(founder) receive an abundance of donations in food kind, but tons of clothes, shoes, accessories and toiletries come in. His back-yard garage is full, and he likes to set up an extra table in the parking lot, laden with shirts and trousers, coats and other garments, sorted out according to size. In case one lucky person obtains a job interview and needs to look dressed up, he can likely pick out something suitable from the lot. You'd be surprised at the great
looking clothes, from suits and prom dresses to uniforms and sportswear, that people cast off our way.
Sometimes, there is a backpack table, and anyone needing a sack can get it from the stock ,after showing a picture ID to make sure that they hadn't just received one. Sharing and consideration for each other are some of the virtues promoted through our ministry. Before the meal, there is a prayer and a short address to all gathered, encouraging them to be polite, neat and reasonable , not only to each other, but to the servers as well, since some amongst us are also in situations of precarity. "We bring what we have to share" CJ announces, "and that is an abundance of love, because we have received love from God and it needs to be shared." He mentions that it would be wonderful if some present that day would not return the following week because they had found employment, but assures them that regardless, we would always be there, each and every Saturday, to feed the hungry, exchange a kind word and pray.

The men and women receive a numbered ticket and queue up. Each one gets a chili hot dog with condiments of his choosing. He gets a bag containing a banana, a packet of chips, cereal and cookies. Then he moves on to the dessert table if he has a mind, and finally chooses a can of soda, a cup of water or coffee. There is a certain air of contentment, gratitude and camaraderie that pervades. The sun shines on a hot day or the rain beats down on other days less favorable, but we are together, and we talk, joke around and the guests dig in.

Now, the interesting thing is that no matter how benevolent you can be towards the homeless, dealing with them presents its particular challenges too. You are tested through this exercise to examine the stuff your apparent unselfishness and empathy is made of. Are you truly understanding, forgiving and kind in the face of rejection, insult and poor attitudes , none of which the homeless are immune to displaying ? They, like the rest of us, can be ungrateful or rude as they have a mind to be. When such behavior s or dispositions are manifested, what is the volunteer called to do? My friend B is as involved and devoted to this ministry as I am. She becomes incredulous at the impatient dissatisfied or outright rude behavior of some - not many - of the homeless. Shouldn't they appreciate everything we try to do for them? Shouldn't they understand that they are not in a position to demand or choose or be grasping and greedy as they feel to? Shouldn't they know they can't be excused just because they are homeless? Her reasoning is indeed sound. But frequently, I wonder inside myself about our duty in all this. Are we supposed to be teaching them a good lesson of discipline or are we there to soothe the friction without reprimanding words, but with a compassionate understanding silence, - the type of response in a look that says you see and know, but love, anyway.

In the former case, the lesson may be one that they already know they have to learn or else have ignored. The ones guilty are never the children amongst them, and those adults have been around long enough. Why would a scolding do any new magic just because it came from us? In the latter case, would total tolerance, absence of reprimand but instead an understanding calm response send home the lesson and change the offensive attitude more effectively? The Word says:"Love covers a multitude of sins" which for me means that you can overlook sometimes, especially when the offender is a homeless person , trapped inside circumstances that too frequently calls forth aggression as a means of survival. Eventually, they can hardly distinguish anymore when to act civilly, or else they hardly care anymore. Further, homelessness, drugs, drinking ,disease, death and desperation hardly allow for the finer human graces or the thought-before-action response to surface every time - at least not for all of them. It does not excuse the wrong behavior, but it explains a great deal and can be enough to call forth a "love that covers all" response from us.

I can only guess at what any one of these human beings have been subjected to (or have subjected himself to) but I do know that many feel less than human after years of deprivation and homelessness. The street life of abuse and atrocities they cannot be sheltered from messes with their minds, and most do not think logically anymore. A vast majority are schizophrenic and haunted by thoughts of being pursued, threatened or singled out in some way. In their world, we may well be the perpetrators!

Most of all, whatever response we choose in dealing with the homeless, we must allow ourselves to grow as Christians through it. The biggest challenge is not just to respond in an admirable fashion in front of the many witnesses, but to accept the deep transforming change within that God desires for us, by stilling our tongues in complaint about the unpleasant encounters, and instead, submitting our every thought and feeling of objection to the affront, to God, who stands in between ourselves and the offender, placing His peace and serenity in our hearts.